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Thursday, 5 October 2017

Uru Eke: Have You Considered Inter-Racial Dating?

What do you think about Interracial relationships?
I’m of the opinion that we should be open minded and consider dating not just outside your tribe, but outside of your race completely. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with our Nigerian/African men. but with the number of people complaining about being single these days, why don’t you step outside your usual pool?

I understand that cultural differences may be a block with some people, but if you give yourself a chance to interact with someone from a different background you may just open yourself up to the possibility of something new and refreshing.




I’m glad to see a lot of intercultural marriages taking place as well. If you are an ardent reader of BellaNaija you’ll be familiar with the pre-wedding shoot posts of couples with different cultural backgrounds.

I think love is color blind, and we should see past the complexion of each other’s skin. The world has evolved a great deal and it is no longer peculiar territory to walk into or been seen with someone who comes from a different ethnicity.

At my mom’s house over the weekend, we had family around and I was talking about some of my friends- some of whom are bi-racial. Then one person said he did not understand why people of different races got married and if a white person walked into our midst at that very moment how awkward it would be as we were all black speaking in igbo(broken igbo, if you ask me).

Why would it be awkward for him? because the person was white? I totally understand if the individual was meeting the family for the first time and didn’t know anyone, but if it’s someone who was familiar with everyone and got on well with us why it would be awkward? Besides we would simply switch to speaking English so whoever it was could join in the banter. He said he just finds interracial relationships/marriages irritating plain and simple. I tried to get him to elaborate and it seemed “irritating” was just how he felt and that’s it.

I don’t know if that’s how my African sisters feel, but I definitely don’t share that outlook. To me race is a social construct; God has created all things, including the color of our skin. (According to the Bible). We all come from the first man and woman, Adam and Eve.

Also, in the Christian Bible, the apostle Paul taught the same when he declared that God created all things, that He is the Lord of heaven and Earth, and that He made all nations from one man, Adam. (Acts 17:24-26)
To buttress this, there is only one race – the human race).
Your decision of a partner should be based on a person’s character, and not the color of their skin.

There are substantial increases in the number of individuals engaging in interracial or intercultural marriages. However, even though the number and societal acceptance of interracial marriages is growing, little has been written about these marriages, the reasons for their increase, or their strengths and liabilities. I was reading up on this the other day and I found a few statements and questions people in interracial relationships say they have been asked.

• What do your parents think?
• You must be so brave!
• I’ve got to get me one of those
• Are you the nanny?
• Is the sex different?

I’ve been with non-Africans and the common question I get asked is the size of their package. (*covers-face*) Just know this, I wasn’t dissapointed. A friend of mine complained one time of not finding a man in Nigeria and I gave this same advice. Look beyond nigerian men, heck look beyond black men. She was very hesitant, especially because she’s a woman of a certain age with children. I pushed and talked and talked till I ran out of anything else persuasive to say. Anyway, she eventually agreed and we signed up on a dating site, before I knew what was going on, she was on a date almost everyday. It was hilarious! She had discovered a new world. Guess what? She’s married today to a non-Nigerian.

I’m not saying there are any guarantees that you’ll find your knight in shining armour by dating interracially, because the truth is people are people, no matter the color.

At least, give it a shot. You never know where you’ll find love.

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Uru Eke is an actress, host, and activist.Her website is www.urueke.net Instagram: @urueke




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